As a survival instinct, we avoid things that are toxic for ourselves. You don’t eat foods you’re allergic to; we avoid toxic substances and drugs. So, why do we find it so difficult to stay away from toxic people and toxic relationships?

The term “toxic relationship” is not always used to solely define a romantic relationship. You can have toxic friends, toxic parents, or you could even be toxic to yourself.

It is difficult to identify when you’re in a toxic relationship, because not every toxic person exhibits the same traits, and not every victim of a toxic relationship reacts the same, and not every situation is the same.

So, how exactly can we identify whether we’re in a toxic relationship or not? According to Psychology Today, there are 8 things that most toxic people in your life will exhibit.

Those things are being manipulative, in which they subconsciously convince you that what they want is more important than what you want. They are judgmental and critical about you, what you do, and the things you like. They take no responsibility for their feelings or actions. If they do or act negatively, their actions are projected on to you. It’s always about you, not them. They don’t apologize, because things are never their fault.

They are inconsistent, prone to mood swings and indecisive. At any given moment, they could have a fit about something you said or did. You always have to prove yourself to them, even though you don’t ask the same in return, and no matter what you do, it won’t be enough. And lastly, they don’t support, or simply don’t care, about the things that are important to you.

If you notice any of these red flags in the people in your life, it’s important to point them out, and if necessary, cut that person out of your life.

Even subconsciously, you could be the one exhibiting these toxic traits. Self evaluations are important, to realize what you could be doing better, and also what you need the people in your life to do. If you don’t take care of the relationships in your life, it could eventually lead to emotional burnouts.

If you do find yourself in a toxic relationship, the first thing you need to do is realize that you are exempt of fault, as long as you were not the toxic person. Don’t feel responsible for the way the other person made you feel.